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Sermons

ADVENT
DECEMBER 14, 2008
Deane Oliva

RING!  RING! 

“Hi honey. Yes, Christmas is almost here. I am so excited. I’m going shopping after church.  So far, I think that we have gifts for all your relatives and most of mine.  We still need to get my aunt and uncle something really nice, since they let us stay with them this summer. And I’ve gotten daughter dear a big gift and a small one, but we will need some little things for her stocking and we need to get treats for the animals.  Oh, and we can’t forget that Keisha’s present can’t cost more than Tommy’s. You know, I didn’t want to spend more than $100.00 but that just isn’t going to work. I’ll have to put stuff on my credit cards. We have parties this week and we really should bring a little something with us. Maybe we can bake some cookies. Oh. I got a nice little Christmas card tucked in the newspaper yesterday, so I guess that means we should give the newspaper deliverer a gift. And the mail carrier.  Do they give gifts to the garbage folks out here?  Oh, and I almost forgot, the dance teacher and the angel tree.  Toys for Tots if we can.  We promised to get together with the neighbors on Thursday, but we have that other party, maybe we could do both.  You know if we don’t go to Justin and Mary’s maybe we won’t have to buy them a gift. We have tickets to the U of E basketball games on Tuesday and Friday night, and we are wrapping gifts for the homeless on Wednesday next week. We have to visit with my family and your family and I’d really like to spend some alone time with you.  If we take off a couple of days maybe we can fit everything in.  Okay, I’ll see you after I get done shopping. Should be home about seven or eight if I’m lucky, but luckily, most of the stores are open until midnight tonight. Bye. Love you.”

Just in case you think I might be going overboard, I will quote some Gift Giving Rules taken from Unplug the Christmas Machine[1]. Before you laugh at my dilemma, see how many of these rules you honor.  
 

1.    Give a gift to everyone you expect to get one from.

2.    If someone gives you a gift unexpectedly, reciprocate that year. You might want to keep a few pre-wrapped generic gifts just such an occasion.

3.    When you add a name to your gift list, give that person a gift every year thereafter.

4.    Gifts exchanged between adults should be roughly equal in value.

5.    The amount of money you spend on a gift determines how much you care about the recipient.

6.    If you give a gift to a person in one category (for example a coworker or neighbor), give a gift to everyone in that category, and these gifts should be similar in value.

 

Unfortunately, too often, we do too much. We immerse ourselves in holiday preparation rituals which consume our time and energy. We worry about our obligations. Too often we attempt to buy every possible gift, attend every party, visit every one of our friends and relatives and have the perfect holiday rituals in our own homes.
 

This treadmill is our existence for the holidays.  Some of us are proud of the fact that we are excellent multi-taskers, able to fit in a jillion tasks in the shortest amount of time possible.  We can bake a pie, supervise homework, listen to NPR and do the bills simultaneously.  What a feat!  But are we also aware of the persistent fatigue that accompanies these routines?  How often have I been utterly exhausted after the holidays?  I’ve gained ten pounds. I’m tired and sluggish and all I want is a good rest.

Thomas Merton speaks so eloquently to this point when he speaks of the violence that we do to ourselves by overextending.  He wrote:

The rush and pressure of modern life are a form, perhaps the most common form, of innate violence. To allow oneself to be carried away by a multitude of conflicting concerns, to surrender to too many demands, to commit oneself to too many projects, to want to help everyone in everything is to succumb to violence.  More than that, it is cooperation with violence. The frenzy of the activist neutralizes his work for peace.  It destroys her own inner capacity for peace.  It destroys the fruitfulness of his own work because it kills the root of inner wisdom which makes work fruitful.[2] 

 

Merton was speaking of activists, yet his words ring true in all times. When we submit to the hustle and bustle of overactivity without reflection, it neutralizes our actions and destroys our inner capacity for peace.

How do we get off the treadmill?  Is there a way to remove ourselves from the hustle and bustle that fills the air and the air waves.  Yes, yes, there is.  We can re-create a sense of the season, a sense of….

Waiting.  It’s a bit uncomfortable at first, isn’t it? But this is the season of waiting, of advent, before the coming. 

Holly W. Whitcomb in the Seven Spiritual Gifts of Waiting[3]  notes:

“I hate waiting just about as much as anything in this world.  I will not eat at a restaurant if I have to stand and wait.  I will not even approach a freeway entrance if there is any possibility I will have to sit in traffic....

I obviously could use a good dose of Advent.

The season of Advent, more than any other time in the church year, invites us to embrace the spiritual discipline of waiting.  The season will not be rushed.  The carols must be sung, the candles lighted week by week and the doors of the Advent Calendar must be opened day by day...

Every stage of our lives involves some new form of waiting.  When our children are tiny, we wait years for a good night’s sleep.  When our children are toddlers, we wait eagerly for the time when they will no longer wear diapers...  When our children are teenagers, we often wait anxiously until we hear the front door close and know they are safely home...

If we welcome waiting as a spiritual discipline, waiting will present its spiritual gifts if we are conscious enough and courageous enough to name them and live into them.”

 

Waiting is a time of reflection and preparation. For some of us, in this season it is the symbolic birth of a prophet, a messiah, one who is called God.  For others it is the time between the harvest and the new growth. When we listen to TS Eliot’s Journey of the Magi, we ponder with the magi,  the interrelatedness of birth and death. Each birth is accompanied by the death of an old way; it is a new beginning.  For many of us the season is the renewal of a hope for a more loving and compassionate world. 

Historically, Advent began in the fourth century in France, probably from Celtic monks. In its earliest form it was a period of preparation for the Feast of the Epiphany with an emphasis on prayer and fasting. In 581 the local council in Macon France  designated the period between the Feast of St. Martin of Tours until Christmas as a period of fasting every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  Eventually similar practices appeared.  The practice spread to Rome in the sixth century as a preparation for Christmas with less of a penitential bent. By the tenth century it was fully a time of preparation and devotion. It wasn’t until the twentieth century that joy became a central tenet of the period.  And yet, even as the Church initiated rites of preparation and devotion, the seasonal calendar was somewhat at odds with rituals.

Environmentally, in many parts of the world, advent is the beginning of the cold season.  For years, cold weather meant that animals could now be slaughtered for food. You see, during most of the year, very little meat was consumed for, if animals were killed, the meat could not be safely stored and it would spoil quickly.   Often folks were close to starvation. Cold weather meant the arrival of an extended time to eat meat.  Cold weather meant that the harvests which folks had struggled with throughout the growing season was finally in.  This was the most plentiful time of the year for food.  Additionally, beer and wine were now sufficiently fermented for consumption.  Couple these wonderful coincidences with the fact that, in an agricultural community, the coming days were a time for rest, when not much work needed to be done.  For the next few months there would be plenty of time for rest, reflection, catching up and planning.  Is it no wonder that the harvest parties got pretty wild?
 

And so, for many, many years we have had this conundrum, these competing pressures to, on the one hand, somberly prepare for the spiritual wakening which Christmas represents versus, on the other hand, the urge to heartily celebrate the joy of a completed harvest and the coming holiday.

The search for balance has been particularly difficult in America. Many early Puritans felt were Calvinists. They envisioned a strict adherence to the bible, a devout demeanor and a restriction of recreational activities.  So, they outlawed the celebration of Christmas and made practicing it punishable by a five schilling fine. [4]   “They made a particular point of keeping the courts and public offices open throughout the season. It was to be just another workday.” [5] 

As you might expect, it was difficult even for the Puritans to take the partying out of Christmas and the festivities continued despite laws and complaints.  In fact, with the industrial revolution, the crush of urbanization and unemployment violence became an unwelcome element of the celebrations.  What could be done to tone down the revelry in this holiday season? 

Clement C. Moore, a Unitarian professor of Oriental and Greek literature at Columbia University tried to give us another vision.  In 1823, Moore wrote a poem called “A Visit from St. Nicholas.”   Some say that this one poem, which gave parents a vision of what Christmas was supposed to look like, created an entire mythology which has been used in this country as a model for the perfect Christmas ever since.  It suggested Santa in a red suit, reindeer complete with names, and stockings filled to the brim.  Popularly, we now know this poem as “Twas The Night Before Christmas.”  Soon, instead of complaints about the over hearty partying of the adults, the new Puritan complaint was against selfishness and greed, consumerism corrupting the children. 

 Unitarian minister named Charles Follen of Lexington MA began setting up a Christmas tree in 1835.[6] This was a tradition of his native Germany and he wanted his son Charley to see its beauty.  It was hoped that the tree and not gifts would become the central “surprise” of the holiday.  It was also hoped that gift giving on the part of the children would become just as important as gift receiving.

One might argue that Clement and Follen were attempting to return the holiday to its more spiritual roots; others argue that their attempts were to popularly secularize the holiday.  Both views have their proponents. What is clear is that several traditions abound simultaneously and that each has evolved over time. Casting St. Nick as a jolly old, caring man, was an attempt not to commercialize Christmas but, rather, to return to the custom of joyous celebration of family and bounty.  And that it did, but then, for some, bounty became the most important element.  Santa was followed by the advent of the Christmas tree.  The Christmas tree was supposed to bring back a sense of mystery, surprise and awe to the season, which it did, before it was commercialized, perhaps beyond repair.  The beautiful candles professing our procession from darkness to light has turned into a Hollywood extravaganza of competitive commercialism. 

What then is the reason for the season? Is it important to make meaning for this period?  I vote yes!  It is spiritually worth the effort to balance our spiritual yearnings with the festivals of celebration.

To balance ourselves we must refrain from self abuse.  We must, I must, become aware of the violence that I am doing to myself during this overextended season.   Truly, consumerism has globally infected our beings over the last century. And yet this is not a blame game. Who does not want to play with the new toys?  Who does not want to be on the cutting edge?  Who wants to miss the excitement of the latest inventions, discoveries and novelties.  What I must realize, though, is that this push to know, to be included,  is part of the violence to myself.  Newsflash! We cannot know everything.  We cannot keep up with everything.  There are only so many plates that one can balance and only for so long. Then,  even though I can continue to balance, I am off balance.  The energy expended no longer matches the reward. 

 

Almost two hundred years ago another Unitarian tried to show us the way.  He wrote a Christmas book that attempted to show the importance of compassion and generosity in this giving season.  He did this through having the main character reflect on the person he had been and the person he would surely be if he did not change his ways.  I’m sure that you recognize the story. It is A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens.

Ebeneezer Scrooge returns us to the topic of the day. Certainly, it is easy to see the violence that he did to himself through his lifestyle. Truly, it was significant for him, to review his values and actions so that he could know himself better and figure out what was really essential to him. This was his period of preparation for change.  It was not easy to face behaviors that were not so becoming, that caused pain to others, that satisfied spurious needs.  Yet, without that period, that waiting period, that reflective journey, he could not be reborn.

What does it take to enter into that waiting period?  How can you center yourself during this time?  Could it be through listening?  Perhaps to the Hallelujah Chorus, the songs at the mall, the birds in the park.  What happens when you are in the midst of the hustling and bustling and you sit and close your eyes.  Perhaps for you it might be turning the lights off and lighting a candle, that brings a sense of peace.  Perhaps it is a walk in the late evening, lifting your eyes to the stars.  Perhaps that feeling of awe comes when you are sharing with family. Now is the time to prepare for it.  Perhaps saying gratitudes together lends a sense of awe to the meal.  Perhaps it is going around the table and sharing or reading out loud.  Is there a good time to hold hands or sing together? Would saying an evening prayer center the moment? You might try writing a little about the people that are important to you, with the intention of sharing it on Christmas. Perhaps family members could pick a room and later, after a time to reflect, share the good times that the room holds for them.  Perhaps the greatest preparation you can do for the holiday is to rest fully so that you can partake fully in the joys of the season.  Perhaps you have had a loss this year – a job, a friend, a relationship, a pet, or a relative.  How will you weave this loss into the fabric of the holiday.  How will you hold the memories, the fears and the sadness? Now is the time to prepare.

On the plane this week I asked my seatmates what was the one thing that made Christmas special to them.  My family said one.  My daughter said the other, “It’s all about my daughter.”  We chatted for a few minutes and then the subject changed. Five hours later, as they de-planed, one of the gentlemen turned and thanked me for asking the question, noting that it had been important for him.  I turn that question now to each of you, what one two or even three things must you have in order to make this holiday season a good one. I invite you to wait and prepare, to put your energy where it truly matters and develop new rituals, ones that most fulfill the yearnings of your heart. Then joy will certainly rise and you will be at peace with the universe.

May it be so.


[1] Robinson, Jo, and Staeheli, Jean C.   Unplug the Christmas Machine: A Complete Guide to Putting Love and Joy Back into the Season New York: William Morrow & Company, 1991.

[2] Merton, Thomas quoted in Pax Christi, p. 140

[4] Spero, Ellen Rowse  “Creating Christmas”  Sermon 12/14/03 Fist Parish Unitarian Universalist Church of Chelmsford MA .

[5] Robinson, Christine “An American History of Christmas” Sermon 12/16/07 First Unitarian Church of Albuquerque.NM.

[6] Robinson, op.cit, p. 5.


 

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